Disclaimer: Smallville and its characters are copyrighted by DC Comics and Warner Brothers. Warning: Luthorcest and general silliness

"You know this is illegal?" Lex questioned.

"It's symbolic."

"You say tomato." Lex replied dryly.

The line moved slowly. Even the great Lionel Luthor could not control beau racy. The courthouse was hot and sticky and the baseball cap Lex was wearing added to his discomfort. He adjusted his shades and shoved his hands in the pockets of his well-worn jeans. Lex hated waiting as much as his father did. He glanced over at the wry frame of the older man standing next to him. Faded jeans, hair pulled back tightly in a ponytail and round rimmed lavender tinted glasses. He was beautiful.

"Where's our witness", Lionel asked, slightly agitated.

"He'll be here. You know he's not know for punctuality."

"Tell me he doesn't have the rings", Lionel sighed.

"You do dad."

"Sssh", Lionel admonished, checking to crowd to see if anybody heard.

"Oh yeah, I forgot, marrying your father is still illegal", Lex whispered.

"You can leave if you like", Lionel challenged.

Even in this there was a test. Lex sighed.

"Do you want me to leave?"

"Suite yourself", Lionel huffed, hating the whiny tone in his voice.

"Sorry I'm late", the voice of Clark Kent sang cheerily. He was all smiles.

"It's okay", Lex answered curtly, barely looking Clark's way.

Clark looked from the younger to the elder Luthor. 'Their fighting again', he sighed.

"Okay Lionel, what did you do to Lex?"

"Could you repeat that louder so the entire courthouse can hear you?"

"Maybe we should go outside and talk this over", Clark suggested timidly.

"I'm not relinquishing my spot on this line", Lionel protested.

"I'm not marrying someone who doesn't love me", Lex pouted.

"I'm not believing what I'm hearing", Clark said. "First you two insist on doing this in spite of the consequences, then you insist I come all the way to San Francisco to witness it and now you don't want to get married at all?" Clark's voice was slowly rising and he too looked around the room to see if all eyes were upon them.

The dull ache between his eyes he usually got when he was with the Luthor's was beginning again. It started two days ago when Lionel and Lex decide to marry under assumed names. They arranged for fake I.D. and invited their resident alien to witness the spectacle. Clark had been leery at first, but since he'd begun a relationship with both Luthor's, he found that boundaries that had been set for him were slowly eroding daily. He barely went home at all anymore, much to the chagrin of Jonathan Kent. He practically lived in his loft and spent most weekends in Metropolis.

The bickering couple hadn't noticed that the line had moved considerably.

"Next", the clerk called dryly.

Clark nudged the two forward.

"State your name sir."

"Luthor Dunleavy", Lionel answered sharply, barely looking at his betrothed.

"And you sir?"

"Joseph Alexander", Lex spat out.

The clerk eyed them suspiciously as Clark felt his face flush, but this time not from embarrassment but anger.

The clerk dutifully read of the vows and was about to pronounce them married, when "Luthor Dunleavy" interrupted.

"If I may", Lionel began.

Both Lex and the clerk rolled their eyes.

Turning to his beloved, he took his hand, running his finger over the platinum bands they had exchanged.

"Joseph, I promise to share with you in times of trouble, to talk and to listen, to honor and to appreciate you, to provide for and support you in trust and in love. I promise to share my hopes and thoughts and dreams with you. I will work with you to build our lives together. May we grow, our lives forever intertwined, our love bringing us closer."

Lex stared at his father in disbelief. He felt moisture gather in his eyes, and fought hard from crying out 'Oh daddy'. A small thank you escaped the younger Luthor's lips and he flung his arms around the proud and often obstinate man who he loved so dearly, kissing him passionately. Clark felt a tear stream down his cheek and remembered why he loved these men so dearly.

"Will that be all", the clerk interrupted.

Lionel nodded, noting the clerk's name. Gathering their certificate signed and duly witnessed, he vowed to make Lex's honeymoon unforgettable and sweep away the memory of his two failed marriages. He also vowed that upon their return, the tedious clerk would be lucky to get a job at a local convenience store.

Clark watched as the Luthorcorp private jet left the San Francisco airport. The two were headed for Saint-Tropez. Clark sped back to Smallville, hoping to make it in time for his third period Physics Exam and to convince a certain former jock and ex-marine to take a little trip to the city by the bay with him.