October 2001

"Lex!" Clark called out to his friend as he scuffed his way up the driveway, leaves blowing about in his wake. The cold clear light of the Fall sun lit his bald head like a halo, but Clark didn't think it was an observation his friend would appreciate. It did make him smile extra wide for a moment, sparking an answering smile from Lex that faded with Clark's.

"Clark? Is something wrong?" He looked at Clark, who was looking steadily down and blushing furiously. " Clark...is it something I can help with?" He dropped down on the porch step next to Clark and studied his friend's face, or what he could see of it.

"Lex, I wanted to ask.. was wondering..." Clark was nearly wringing his hands, and Lex was becoming concerned at his obvious distress, and he hadn't answered his questions yet, in fact he gave no indication that he'd even heard him...suddenly it clicked." Clark, does this have to do with ...a girl?" Lex tried very hard to keep the amusement out of his voice but some must have leaked out, because Clark dropped his head between his hands and groaned. "Lex! I really don't need you laughing at me now!" Lex nudged him with his shoulder." Hey, Clark, not laughing. I know how difficult these situations can some times be. Girls can be very confusing," he laughed, putting an emphasis on "confusing" that brought a smile back to Clarks face." Do you want to tell me about her," he asked, " or shall I guess who it is?" He smirked at Clark, who shook his head and put his hands over his face again " God! Don't guess, I feel stupid enough", he groaned.

"Clark. You're not the only guy who's ever felt like this... You want advice, I'm happy to give it. You know, it does help to let the person you like know that you like them...it tends to work better that way. At any rate, talking to her won't kill you. And believe it or not Clark, you're not so ugly that a girl wouldn't want to talk to you, in fact they might not even mind being seen with you in public." He grinned widely at Clark for a moment then stood, reaching down to help Clark up. He staggered a bit as Clark took his hand to pull himself up. " Wow, Clark! You're a heavy kid!" The infamous blush crept out for a minute before Clark laughed. " Yeah, well, I had my Wheaties this morning!" "Hunh! A lot of Wheaties, Champ," Lex began to move down the driveway, and Clark followed after, enjoying the crisp sound of the leaves crackling under their feet. They reached the car and Lex slid in with his usual grace.

" You know, Clark, you should invite La... I mean," he said with a little grin, "The young lady, to that harvest fest affair. It's perfect for a not date -date. If you invite your friends along, you've got a safety net, and if it's going the way you want, well, they'll be understanding if you dump them!" Clark laughed at the wicked expression on Lex's face. Before Lex could pull off, he leaned into the open car window, "Hey Lex, would you like to go with?" " Why, thank you Clark, I think I'd like that, um, as long as I don't have to play Cyrano ..." He smiled as he watched Clark frown a little as he processed the comment. He chuckled when Clark got it and rolled his eyes. "Har, har," he said, as he slapped the roof of the car in farewell.

He was still grinning as Lex pulled off in a swirl of dust and leaves and thumping bass.' I'm lucky to have a friend who's older, he thought. Easier to talk to' Clark felt that if he ever got up the nerve to ask him about girls and sex, Lex wouldn't judge or lie to him. Like he'd said before, there wasn't much he hadn't done. Plus the fact that his other closest friend was as clueless about sex as he was, no matter what he said, and his parents, sheesh, they probably didn't even remember how the sex thing went and, Eew! Yuch! Bad, bad thoughts!

He shook his head as if to knock the disturbing thoughts out and laughed to himself. He took the time as he walked back to the house to enjoy the smells of Autumn, and his thoughts slid to images of Lana: walking with him at the Harvest Fest, her cheeks and nose tinted pink by the crisp air, maybe he'd wrap her in his jacket to keep her warm, and she'd lean in a bit to get warmer, of course he'd have to put his arm around her to make it easier to walk that way. Maybe he'd buy her a cup of hot cider, and in his mind's eye he could see her tiny hands wrapped around the hot cup, her lips pursed as she blows gently across the top of the cup...pucker, relax, pucker, relax as she blows on the hot liquid, sending the scent of cinnamon and apples toward him and he can't keep his eyes off her lips, gosh it's getting warmer, really warm and suddenly they're kissing, and her lips are so warm and soft and Lex is watching them and... Hunh?

Clark hit the post so hard that the whole porch shook.

" What the heck? What kind of fantasy is that?" Clark staggered a bit to the side, and reached out to grab the vibrating post. Just as quickly he yanked his shirt closed and checked to make sure his shirttails were long enough. He wanted to go into dinner without dieing of embarrassment .He could feel a warm bloom on his cheeks.' God! Why do I have to blush like a girl all the time! 'He stomped towards the door, feeling betrayed in some vague way by his body. And somehow remembering creepy stalker Lex in his fantasy wasn't helping at all.

Clark waited for Lana in front of the school. She was late today, and he was getting a little impatient to be going. Up the street he could hear someone's system playing really loud and grinned to himself when he heard the growl of an engine. Lex pulled up next to him and rolled down his window. "Clark," he called over the music. " Can I give you a ride?" "Thanks but no, Lex, I'm waiting for Lana." For a second he felt the smallest twinge of regret, but Faithful Boyfriend man came to the fore .He gave Lex one of the * big* grins, hoping he wouldn't be disappointed at his refusal. Clark wasn't sure exactly how he felt when Lex seemed to barely acknowledge being turned down. "Ok, Clark. Hey, come up to the mansion sometime soon, it's been a while since I've seen you!" "Ok, Lex." Clark spoke to an empty spot as Lex sped off down the road. "School zone, Lex," Clark said to himself. He shook his head and smiled. He really kind of missed him since they didn't see each other that much now. But the reason for that was coming toward him, her smile lighting up all the corners of his heart. "Clark!" She waved as she hurried towards him. "Oh, I'm so sorry, I was helping a new student get their bearings here."

"Oh, no problem, I was talking to Lex while I was waiting for you" "Oh, that's nice," she murmured, obviously distracted by something. Clark hitched his backpack higher on his shoulder and took Lana's books so she could put her hands in her pockets. Even with gloves on her hands would get so cold. He kind of liked pressing them to his lips and breathing hot air on them to "defrost" them. Lana always acted like he was dong the greatest thing in the world when he did that, and he felt like a knight protecting his princess. She really did make him feel less like a geek and more like someone special. And the kids at school were a lot friendlier to him since he began going out with Lana. Suddenly to his chagrin he realized his "princess" had been talking to him steadily throughout his whole rambling brain thing.

"...Clark.Did you?"

" Er, what?"

"I didn't know that Fordmans' had been bought by a chain, did you?" "Ah, no?" For a moment he panicked, then managed to pull all the pieces of the conversation together and realized that "chain" meant "stores" and she was talking about the new owners ...maybe? " Whitney's dad transferred here to run this store. He said his dad wanted a better environment for his family. Good thinking, right?" Lana looked up at him with a sunny smile. Of course. Yes. Anything you say, he thought to himself. Just smile at me like that forever and everything will always be perfect."Yeah." he said aloud and blushed. Lana looked at him and flashed a wicked little grin. "Clark! Are you thinking what I'm thinking? " She asked. She stopped and tilted her face up to Clark and leaned into him. "God, I hope so," he said, and bent his head to kiss her. 'This could keep me alive forever,' he thought and wrapped her up in his arms.

Whitney Wade was a nice guy. Everybody thought so. He was quick with a joke or a compliment. He was good at sports, but not arrogant about it. He was involved in the school, got good grades, and didn't mind helping the kids that needed it. He was a great guy and Clark really wanted to kick his butt right off the planet. Was it fair that this great, good-looking guy seemed to be everywhere that he and Lana went? And Lana was so "Oh, Whitney sit with us, and come to the Beanery with us" and... Damn! Damn! Just be with us all the damn time! Clark felt like they were now a three-some and not in any way he wanted. He hated feeling jealous but something was happening that he couldn't control and he felt like he was nailed to the front of a runaway train.

He fidgeted as he waited like always for Lana to come out of the school. He sighed and waited and tried not to think ... He waited till he began to get angry, then waited till he thought he'd cry, then waited till he was about to give up and go home and then he saw them, walking out of the school together. They both looked so terribly sad, and Clark swore his heart stopped. He'd always thought that was such a stupid clich until this moment. His hand flew to his chest and he gasped at the pain. They turned to him, and Clark knew. It was over, no Lana and Clark; some new thing was staring at him, ripping him to shreds. He turned away and began to walk slowly at first, then faster and faster till he was alone and everything was a blur as he sped home. She never even called out to him.

"Clark!" Martha called out." is that you?" She heard footsteps go up to his room. It was odd that he didn't answer and even odder that there was only one set of boots at the door. She climbed the stairs and knocked gently on the door." Clark, sweetie."

"Please go away, Mom, I really don't want to talk right now." which of course was the universal mother's code for "come in right now." She opened the door and found him curled up in a ball on his bed. 'Oh no, they broke up,' she thought sadly." Clark, do you want to tell me what happened?" She sat on the bed and stroked his head. He shoved his face harder into his pillow. "No. "

"Clark. Whatever it is, it will get better some day. Soon. I promise." She stroked her baby's arm, and rubbed circles over his back, and wished that she could take this pain on herself. His sobs got louder even smothered by the pillow, and the bed shook with the intensity of his grief. "Oh, I swear it will get better, sweetie! I wish I could give you some magic words that would fix it, but I can't..." tears swam in her own eyes as she watched her son cry his heart out." I love you so much!"

Clark whipped around and hugged his mother fiercely. "I know." " Clark, give your friend a call. Sometimes it helps to talk it out with someone who doesn't want to kill whoever made their baby cry."

"Mom!" He did manage a wobbly sort of smile, and that made her feel a little better. She kissed him on his cheek and thought of all the times she'd pressed a kiss on a damp round little cheek and magically made it all better. Why did parents have to lose that power? She hugged him and on her way down the stairs she heard him get up to call. "Good,' she thought.

Not long after, Clark came down the stairs looking a little less savaged. " Thanks Mom, that was a good idea. Lex is going to pick me up in a bit. He promised to distract me." He shrugged on his jacket and called over his shoulder "I'm going to meet him on the drive, ok?" He zipped out, and as she sighed and turned to the counter, he zipped back in and gave his mother a hug and kiss. "Thanks, Mom. I really love you too!" He was gone again before she could say a word. His words warmed her like nothing else could and she smiled to herself as she began to get dinner together. She knew he'd survive, and was sorry that Lana and he were done. She was a nice girl but there was no way that she and Clark were destined to be together forever. Underneath her musings ran a small thread of worry... Something about Lex. She knew he must be a good friend to Clark, if he was ready to drop everything and help him out. Clark looked almost happy when he told her he was coming. That had to be good, right?

February 2002

Whitney watched Clark as he walked past. Everyday it was the same thing. Clark would give him this look; the same look a puppy would give you a few seconds after being kicked in the rump. He tried apologizing in every way he knew how, but Clark wasn't having it. He couldn't understand, Clark was fine with Lana, they were even friends again, but he seemed to blame it all on Whitney. He wasn't even sure if it wasn't all his fault, maybe he deserved it, but there was a part of Whitney that had to be everyone's friend and he just couldn't let it go.

"Kent, wait hold up!"

'God! Why doesn't he ever stop!' Clark thought angrily to himself. He could feel Whitney looming up behind him and suddenly he decided to make it stop himself. He turned on him and snarled, "You want to talk? Fine! In here!" He pushed into the boy's room and Whitney followed after.

"Look, Kent. I'm so sorry..."

"Whitney, shut the fuck up!" Both the boys looked a little shocked, but Clark pushed on. "This doesn't have anything to do about how I feel, it's all about you! You want me to forgive you so you can tuck your stupid little halo back on your stupid head and act like you're so good again, Mr. Golden Boy Wade! You know what? You can go to hell!"

Whitney was a little confused as to where the conversation was going, so he thought apologizing again might help, but as he began to speak, Clark shoved him against a wall and pushed his hand against his mouth." I said Shut. The. Fuck. Up."

'Wow,' Whitney thought,' Ok, major mistake. I think he's going to kill me...Clark said fuck! Twice!' Clark's hand pushed harder and slid up slightly, making it harder for Whitney to breathe. He pushed at Clark's wrist but it was like pushing at steel. His lip were mashed open against his teeth and he thought that maybe he could bite Clark and make him let go, but all he managed was a pathetic tonguing against his palm. 'At the least, maybe he'll be grossed out and let go,' Whitney thought. He pressed his tongue harder against Clark's palm and managed a little lick. He rolled his tongue in circles and tried to work up some serious spit, because he was getting angry now, and looked up to glare at Clark... who was looking at him in a very strange way. Suddenly he was hyper aware of what he was doing, of the chill of the tile against his back and the warmth radiating form Clark in front of him and it was so quiet, all he could hear was the sound of his breathing and Clark's... He watched Clark's face as he licked again, this time slow and deliberate. Clark made a tiny sound and his eyes closed for a second, before flying open, looking dazed.

Something in Whitney wanted to see that movement again, wanted to hear that sound again. He wanted to feel the hot shock that sound sent through him again. Clark's hand lifted a little from Whitney's mouth and he took advantage of the space to lick a broad stripe up Clark's palm and then circle again, licking at the salty taste and he had to suck at the base of his thumb. Clark let out a loud gasp and leaned against Whitney. His hand slipped away from his mouth, and both of Clark's hands came to rest against the wall above Whitney' head. Whitney's hands came up to Clark's shoulders, hovering close not touching. He could feel the heat of Clark's body, and felt himself flush. Whitney couldn't help but push into Clark, and when Clark pushed back, he couldn't stop the sound it pulled out of him. For a moment he was horrified until he realized that Clark had made almost the same sound...and suddenly Clark was gone, flattened against the other wall.

"God! I'm..I'm.. so so.. sorry," He stuttered and turned so red he almost glowed." I'm sorry!'

Clark ran out before Whitney could say a word 'Thank God!' He slumped a little against the wall, and thought about what happened, or didn't happen. And why did Clark apologize as if it were his fault? Whitney took the incident apart in his mind, and knew that truthfully he was to blame for it. Whitney figured he'd blown it totally and completely with Clark. He'd just leave him alone now, and hope that things didn't get worse. And of course, never think of this again. Ever. Especially right now. Because he's thinking of Lana right now. Thinking really, really hard about her.

June 2002

The brightness of the sun seemed to wash the colors out around him, that's why Clark liked it better when it rained. There was something about a summer rain that brought out all the colors, seemed to expose their true hues. He wished it was raining now as he walked along the edge of the field with Lex, his imagination serving up a lovely vision of Lex's ice blue shirt glowing, clinging to him... he was really trying to focus on their conversation, or rather Lex did the talking and Clark floated along in the hum of his voice. He really didn't know what he just said to him, he just smiled and nodded and encouraged Lex to wrap him up in his smooth voice.

It took him a few long months, but he finally came to understand Lex's silent language, the one involving eyes, and little half smiles and " accidental" touches, long pulls on slim-necked bottles of imported water. Clark became expert at watching a pink tongue touch delicately at the rim of said bottles, watching gray eyes turn dark when he came into the room. He turned to face his friend, and admired just how fine he looked in suit pants and open collar dress shirt. Even a Luthor had to bow to the heat, and he'd taken his tie off and left it in the car. Clark thought that he'd done this just for him, so he could admire the line of his throat in the open collar.

"Clark! Are you listening?" Lex tilted his head and stared into Clark' s eyes with a mock frown. "Oh, sorry, I kind of drifted for a second...what did you say?" Clark could feel his ears go warm 'jeez...' as he gave all his attention to Lex.

" Would you like to go to Metropolis the next weekend with me, since you're out of school for the summer?" Clark stared at him, completely caught unaware. Was the game heating up? Finally? "Wow! Yeah, I'd love to! I mean, if it's ok with my parents, but I know they'll say yes, cause they'll just have to...." By the look of tolerant amusement on Lex's face, he knew he'd been babbling, he just blushed harder and grinned his biggest happiest grin."Lex, it'll be great! " Lex reached out and squeezed his shoulder, and grinned back. Clark nearly shuddered as an enormous wave of warmth swept him from head to crotch, and he stepped back, never taking his eyes from Lex's face. " Clark, we'll have the best time, you and I," he said. "This will be your opportunity to experience a lot of things you've never had the chance to before."

"Ok, Lex," Clark responded. He couldn't help that his voice sounded rough, but the man had to know what this game was doing to him. Lex looked at him a little quizzically and started to say something but stopped and smiled instead. "Clark, I'll call you later." He turned and walked toward his car, allowing Clark to take the time to enjoy, in his opinion, a truly fine view. Clark shook himself mentally. He had a mission now. He was going to Metropolis with Lex, and nothing was going to get in his way.

Clark waited in Lex's study, wandering around and not touching things by sheer force of will. He was kind of nervous, buzzing with anticipation. It took nearly a week of persuasion (or, according to his parents, whining and pouting) to get his way, but he won permission to spend the weekend in the city with Lex.When Lex finally came in, Clark was so keyed up he nearly jumped out of his skin.

" Clark. Let me guess what your parents said.." He smiled at him and walked over to the bar where Clark was not so much casually leaning as using it to support himself. He bent over to get a juice for Clark and water for himself. Clark loved how that position showed off his long lean form to best effect. When Lex handed the bottle to him, their fingers touched and to Clark it was a trigger. No more games and secret languages needed; they had a weekend to be honest and open with each other. He curved his hands around each side of Lex's head, drew him in and kissed him. Clark was flying, his heart beat so hard it shook him. It was a perfect moment, a moment of pure happiness, and then...

and then it slowly dawned on him. Lex was not kissing back. He was most emphatically not kissing back. With mounting horror, Clark realized that Lex was trying to pull away. He grabbed at Lex and began to beg " No, no, no, Lex, kiss me! Kiss me back!" Clark frantically ran his hands over and over Lex's body, and he redoubled his efforts to pull away from Clark.

"Clark! What the hell are you doing?" He almost fell in an effort to put the bar between Clark and himself. His eyes were wide and shocked as he stared at Clark as though he'd never seen him before. He reached up and touched his lips, wet from Clark's frantic kisses." Shit, Clark!" Clark felt a sharp wrenching pain skewer him as his whole world cracked down the center. He felt like throwing up or screaming, he couldn't hold himself up anymore and dropped to his knees. Lex quickly walked around him in a wide arc to stand by the window." Clark, I don't know what happened to give you any idea that I might want..." Clark leapt to his feet, and stood trembling and sweating. For once he wasn't blushing like a traffic light because he was sure all his blood had congealed in his veins. He felt cold and nauseous and wished he would just die. He looked at his friend and knew Lex wanted him dead, too.

" Lex! God...I..Oh! " Clark tore from the room, and Lex didn't even hear him running down the stairs. He leaned against his desk, shaking in the aftermath of his shock. What the hell had gone on here? Why would Cark do that? He replayed the scene in his head, looking for some point where he might have been at fault. He was so deep in thought; he took no notice of the fact that he licked his still damp lips over and over. Poor kid, he'd have to let him down easy, apologize for freaking on him. He did like the kid a lot, and he didn't want to lose his friendship. 'I'll call him tomorrow,' he thought, stroking his lips absent-mindedly.

He didn't hear from Clark again in almost two years.

October 2004

College life was an eye opening experience for Clark. So many times he'd felt like some country hick in the big city. Eventually, he discovered that people were pretty much the same wherever you go, there would always be jerks and there would always be someone who was willing to hold out a helping hand. Getting lost on his way to class had resulted in one of the better moments of his life happening to him. His own personal knight in shining armor had stepped in to save him. Mark pulled him out of the deep hole he'd been in ever since His Mistake. His Mistake. He could hear the caps in his mind on the rare occasion that he thought of it. It was as though Whitney had thrown him down a dark and twisted rabbit hole that he was only now beginning to emerge from. Now every day was a little brighter because he knew Mark would be the first thing he saw when he awoke, and the last thing he saw before sleep. He liked spending every moment he could with him. And hey, the sex alone was mind-boggling! He laughed aloud, and got a grumpy snort in return.

" Hey, Farmtoy, less noise." Mark rolled over and flopped across Clark's chest, exhaling noisily. " Jeez, Dragon-breath, less breathing!" Clark laughed again and tried to pull the covers over his head, but Mark tunneled after like a terrier. "I'm gonna hug you!" he crooned. He wriggled down lower and nipped Clark on the belly. " I love you cupcake! " God, you are such a cartoon head," Clark groaned. The nips became progressively more caressing, much more interesting. Mark licked and kissed his way lower and lower, and Clark groaned in impatience, lifting his hips towards Mark's apparently clueless tongue.

" There. Right there, you evil tease," he moaned. Mark laughed, blowing tiny gusts of air over Clark's fever hot skin, and finally took pity on him. Clark yelped when Mark took him in his mouth, sucking hard and fast. Clark's hands grabbed the back of his head and rubbed and rubbed over his buzz cut scalp. He loved the way the hair brushed his palms, like soft kisses. He carefully pressed a little harder and Mark responded, taking him in even deeper. Clark panted, his hips jerking in Mark's grasp. Clark rubbed across his lover's shoulders, and got a brief flash of a smooth scalp under his hands instead, and that undid him. He came so hard he thought he might die, exploding in a wave of guilt and desire. Before he had a chance to think, almost before Mark could breathe, Clark had him, in his mouth, in his arms, wrapped up and trying to show him with his body that he was the only one he ever thought of. He pressed his dick tight against the roof of his mouth, rubbing the head against it, sliding him back into his throat as he slid his fingers into him. He alternated between gentle and hard, working Mark by degrees towards coming, and when he did, he chanted Clark's name like a prayer. He rested his head on Mark's thigh, waiting for control to return, as Mark combed his fingers through his hair and made a little sound of contentment. Clark knew that he could never have more then what he had now. It would never be possible. But he'd been given a chance for some happiness, and he was taking it, and he'd do his best to make sure that Mark knew nothing but happiness from this relationship.

March 2005

'Ok, I'll meet you by the bar," Mark yelled in his ear. Clark nodded to let him know that he'd heard and began working his way toward it. He was never very comfortable in a club without Mark by his side; it just wasn't something he cared to do. But Mark enjoyed it, and Clark didn't mind doing it for him, once in a while. He leaned against a stool and watched the crowd, it was one thing he did kind of like. He felt a little like a xenobiologist, observing the mating habits of an alien species, which, if he really thought about it, was in no way funny. Clark sighed heavily, and checked the ever-moving crowd for the sight of Mark's wild shock of dark hair. He spotted him easily; the two of them topped nearly everyone here. 'One of the advantages of having a tall boyfriend' he grinned to himself. Mark was speaking to someone that Clark couldn't quite see, he saw him smiling and shaking his head. Curious, because it was rare for Mark to speak to someone they didn't both know, he asked who it was as Mark came up.

"I don't know, somebody who thought I was someone they knew," He leaned into Clark, mischief flashing in his green eyes." Jealous? Maybe you need to show me why I shouldn't stray, hmm?" Clark put his lips against his ear and in a tone that sent a shiver down Mark's spine, said "Baby, you know what?" Clark ran a hand down his side and let it rest on his hip.

" Hunh..." Mark pressed his ear harder against Clark's lips.

"You're such a maroon!"

" Ok, officially no longer an item here!" Mark laughed. " I used to go out with some guy named Kent but not any more." They were still laughing when Mark nudged him and pointed across the bar." There's the guy I was talking to. See, he's cute but he's definitely no you." Clark started to look in the direction Mark was pointing; suddenly he knew it was the worst thing he could do, he started to shake his head, but Mark grabbed his chin and swung it around till he was looking where he'd pointed." See, no contest! "

Fuck. He knew it. He had his arm around some model-clone Barbie and was moving away from them, but Clark knew him, how could he not. Thank God, he hadn't seen them. There was no way he could deal with him, even now. Clark turned away. He didn't feel like watching Lex leave.

Lex drifted around the penthouse not really paying attention to his surroundings. He sipped from the cut crystal glass in his hands, balancing the weight of it between his palms. It had been an ...interesting evening. First, he mistook that kid with the nearly shaved head for Clark, but with the long top falling into his eyes, he really did look like him in that light. He sat on the sofa, set the glass on the end table and stretched, rubbing his bare feet into the soft fibers of the carpet. Strange, he never thought about Clark anymore, that much.. lips, wet, hot ...He was simply a memory of a time spent elsewhere, in a world that was alien to him. He was sorry that Clark and his' friendship tanked after the Incident. He'd been really surprised at how much he'd missed the kid. And honestly, it kind of hurt when he realized he was probably never going to see him again. It had been a real shock to see him, really him, standing there, nice, till he caught the expression on his face. God, he couldn't get out fast enough after that, just let him think that he hadn't been seen. The night had just slid straight to shit, too. His date, Peri "with an I" had been so boring she could have driven a saint to suicide. Shame, because she was just the type he liked, tall, willowy, full lips and green eyes to die for. He imagined her on her knees in front of him, excitement shining in dark lashed eyes, tongue peeking out to touch soft red lips. She'd lean closer, her hot breath on his thigh ...

Lex leaned back on the sofa and undid his trousers, sliding them down below his hips. He took himself in his hand, stroking slowly over his erection. He closed his eyes, and went back to his fantasy. She opened her mouth, tongue sliding out and licking along his length, wringing a sigh from him. He buried his fingers in dark thick hair, as her hands slid up his thighs, rocking him gently in and out. He moaned on each slide in, hot, wet, soft muscular lips, cheeks hollowing on each slow pull out, big hands squeezing, kneading his ass, fingers brushing again and again in the cleft.making him shudder, his breath coming harder, rougher. He looks down into green eyes brimming with emotion, and gasps as he's pushed back, out of the wet heat and a husky voice commands "Come now, Lex ...

His head slammed against the back of the sofa as he came with a breathy yell. Clark's face faded as he came back to reality, grimacing a bit as he wiped his hand on his belly. He had to admit to himself, that particular scenario had been starring in his fantasies more often than he liked to think about. He leaned forward on the sofa and leaned his forehead against his fists. No one should be this confused at this age. Lex got up with a sigh, and padded to the shower. There was nothing he could do, Clark was happy, he'd seen that much. Lex knew he could never have more of him then...this, these strange unhappy fantasies. It was a waste of time to wish for more.

May 2005

Strangely, Clark didn't feel like dying after Mark left. It wasn't a big dramatic breakup; there was no violence, no accusations, no drama at all really. It was more like a drifting apart, a steady separation that went on and on till one day, there was nothing holding them together. True, that didn't make it any less sad; there were tears from both of them when they finally admitted it was over. Then it was just Clark, and one other person who also knew the Secret. As slow as the process of revealing his secret to Mark had been, the unraveling of their relationship followed the same pace, a slow dance of deconstruction. At the end, they were still friends, because another thing Clark learned from Whitney was how to be friends, no matter what. They could meet and have lunch and laugh with no outward sign of unease, even though all their interactions were shot through with the knowledge that Mark knew, and hadn't been able to handle it.

When Clark had brought Mark to meet his parents, he'd made it clear that the person he was going to be with had to know who and what he was. He needed to be able to protect those he loved, and that was impossible unless those he were protecting knew that they were being kept safe, and why. His parents surprised him by agreeing with him, and they'd talked long into the night. Clark felt closer to them than he'd had since he was in high school. He loved his parents so much, and his heart swelled as he realized just how much they loved him.

June 2005

Martha wasn't surprised at all to get the call about the breakup from Clark. She thought back to when they had visited and how happy the two looked. Martha had been so pleased to see Clark and Jonathan talking so freely together. It was wonderful that he'd accepted Mark so readily and she hoped that the next person Clark brought to meet them would receive as warm a reception, because she known they wouldn't see Mark again. As lovely as it had been for Clark to have Mark meet his friends and see the town where he grew up, it was that very act of opening up which dealt the deathblow to the relationship. There was no doubt in her mind that he would never let the secret out, but it was obvious to her Mark didn't have the strength to deal with the reality of it day by day. She knew through Pete it took a special person to carry that burden, to live with it and not come to resent having to carry it. For Mark, it became too much. She could understand, God, it was hard for them sometimes and they'd had twenty years to deal with it. Martha had a thought she kept strictly to herself. She felt there was one person who could deal with Clark's secret and even be able to protect him, be someone for Clark to lean on, but that was long ago and not a likely possibility now. Thank God, at least she could look out for her baby, be there when he needed her, and... maybe the best way to look out for her son was to take matters into her own hands.

Letter to Lex Luthor

*Dear Lex,
Though I know it's been quite a while, I'm hoping that you remember us with as much fondness as we remember you. Of course, you may not feel any fondness at all when you realize I'm writing to ask for a favor. Clark wants to stay in Metropolis during the summer break from M.U.,, and I hope that you might be able to keep an eye on him, and convince him to please not stay where he plans to. (It is beyond frightening!) I know it's the first time I've contacted you in almost two years (!) but I couldn't think of anyone else whom I'd trust with my son! I hope that you'll get in touch with us soon, but if not, believe me, I'll understand. With deepest regards,
Martha Kent*

June 2005

The knock on the screen door startled Martha. She'd been taking advantage of a little free time; Jonathan was in town with Clark, buying a few things that he needed. And she was indulging in a crossword and some quiet. 'God knows,' she thought to herself as she got up to answer the door,' I'm thrilled to have my boy back home again, but, goodness, what a change...'She was stunned to see Lex standing on her doorstep. When he'd never responded to her letter, she assumed he'd been offended and figured that she wasn't going to hear from him.

" Lex! My goodness! What a surprise!" She pulled open the screen door and drew him inside .He looked a little shy, and a little pleased at her obvious pleasure at seeing him.

"Martha. It's been a long time." He extended his hand to her and she used it to pull him into a hug. She had to smile when his cheeks flushed faintly pink for a moment. She moved back into the kitchen and Lex followed her. When she turned to motion him to sit she caught a look of ...happiness? ..on his face It was gone so quickly that she wasn't sure what she really saw there, but Martha was going to go with her impression. In fact, she was about to leap out into space with this and trust that someone was going to catch her!

"So, Lex, as truly glad as I am to see you, I'm wondering what brings you back to us?"

He took a moment to enjoy the warmth of her words and responded thoughtfully. "Mrs. Kent, I did get your letter and I apologize for not getting in touch with you right away. I've been out of the country on business, and I only recently had any free time .I think you know what a precious commodity that is!" she smiled at him and brought him a glass of iced tea. "Of course, I understand. I was a little worried that I'd overstepped..."

"No, no, not at all, I'm more than happy to help," Lex cut in " Now, I've done some thinking about your problem, and I think I have an excellent solution. I have an apartment near Metropolis central that I'd be more than happy to have Clark use, if you and Mr. Kent agree..."

Martha looked steadily at Lex, "You mean the penthouse...that would be more than generous of you."

" Well, no actually, but I 'm sure that Clark would prefer his own place, don't you? You really don't have to worry about him; I have a housekeeper there who spent a lot of time with me as a teenager. I think if she survived me, she can handle Clark. Plus, even though she knows me, she's strangely loyal to me. I'm sure she'd keep ...track for us." He smiled, a real smile playing over his lips a he looked at Martha; his eyes sparkled as he enjoyed their conspiracy. Martha smiled back, but sighed inwardly. This was going to take longer than she thought. Possibly much longer than she thought.

Clark had been so furious with his mother that he truly thought for a moment that his head was going to explode .How in the heck could she go to Lex of all people in the world! What in the world was she thinking? How could she be so, so, thoughtless? Well sure, she didn't know what had happened between Lex and him, but come on! He hadn't talked to him or even mentioned his name in what? Two years? God! And then he puts him in some place halfway across the city away from him! *Ok! Getting it, Mr. HetroMc.Straighty-Pants. Jeez like I might rape him if we were in the same spot. Oh, and let's not even talk about the fact he took off before I even got back so I could turn him down in person...Or the fact I'm having a screaming fit with myself in my head, Bastard! I'll talk to him later. Right now, I want to find out how Mom got Dad to agree to this craziness.*

The next week found Clark standing in the doorway of his "bachelor pad" as his Dad kept calling it. Clark had no idea why he thought it was so very amusing. He guessed it was just some kind of old folks thing. So here he was, with a key, a note, and that was about it. Lex hadn't called or been there to meet him when he came into town. He'd sent the darn key in the mail. And not even to him, but to his Mom. Jeez, what an ignorant, egotistical jerk!

Clark decided not to spend another minute thinking about someone he couldn't believe that he thought he'd been in love with when he was a teenager. An idiot teenager. It infuriated him that he still blushed hotly at the horrible mistake he'd made. He'd deluded himself into thinking Lex returned the feelings he had had at the time. Well, that wasn't going to be a problem now. Or ever. Clark dropped the box he was carrying in the..hall, he guessed it was. Wow, at least the place was nice, really nice. It had a big open floor plan and lots of light. He walked around taking in the hardwood floors, and the kitchen,' cool, food and everything.' It even came with an entertainment system. He walked down the hall to the two bedrooms. He looked in the larger room and figured it must have been Lex's when he'd lived there. There were linens on the bed, and he checked and saw that there was stuff in the bathroom, soap and plain white towelsprobably cost more than everything I'm wearing now. There were even several types of shampoo and that made him snicker a bit. He poked about in the closet (empty) and in the drawers, (also empty) Finally Clark sat on the edge of the bed in his fully furnished and highly impersonal new apartment and cursed himself for feeling so disappointed that beyond doing a favor for his parents, Lex didn't care about him at all. Jerk!

It took nearly an hour for Lex to make his way to the apartment door. When he and Martha had set this up, Lex never thought for a second about the fact that he had somehow developed an unhealthy obsession with her son, who had a starring role in the increasingly more vivid fantasies that haunted him. When he'd been speaking with the Kents, his only concern was that they get Clark moved in and ready for his summer job within the week. It'd felt so comfortable, like it did when Clark was still in high school, and the boy who'd saved his life had become his best friend, an innocent, young and sweetly nave. Clark had been a welcome respite from the type of people that he'd known in the city, the one's who swore that they'd do anything for you, except do anything for you. But all the joy was sucked out of it when he realized he would at some point have to deal in person with a young man who had no reason to feel any warmth towards him.. What should he say to him? What could he say to him that wouldn't be awkward? He knew from the reaction he'd gotten at the club, that Clark didn't give a damn about him anymore. After all Clark was older now, definitely experienced. He'd seen the way his.. what?.. boyfriend had been wrapped around him, how they'd kissed. Clark must have been with a lot of really attractive guys since the last time they'd seen each other. God! Why was he so damn nervous? *You're acting like a fucking girl: grow up. It's not like he's going to spit on you. Maybe.Maybe we'll be lucky and he'll actually speak to us. Maybe we shouldn't use we 'cause it makes us sound insane*.. Lex gently knocked his head against the doorframe * I'm so fucked* and nearly fell through when the door was yanked open.

"Oh! Oh. It's you'," Clark said, giving Lex a very suspicious look. He seemed to fill the whole doorway, not quite looming out of it and definitely giving the impression he'd rather close it again.

" It's me," Lex smiled, or at least hoped the expression on his face could pass for one. Clark didn't look too impressed, glaring at Lex, but then he seemed to shake himself and stood aside, making a motion for Lex to come in, "Sorry, please come in, I didn't mean to be rude," he said with a complete lack of sincerity." Of course, seeing how this is your place and I'm sure you have a key, I guess I don't really need to invite you in, do I?" He stomped off towards the kitchen as Lex came in and shut the door behind him.

'Well. That went much better then I expected. I think. And now what?... Oh, Clark, by the way remember when I threw you out after you made a pass at me, lo those many years ago? Well, and this is the funny part, it turns out maybe I'm gay after all! And I hate my inner voice beyond all reason', he sighed to himself.

Clark heard the sigh and spun around, fixing Lex with a hard look."Is there something wrong?" he asked"Did I do something wrong here?" Lex wondered how things could get worse then they were now. "No Clark, not at all. Look, I want you to think of this as your place for the entire time you're here, ok?" He placed a set of keys on a low table. " These are the only other keys to the place. I'm leaving them with you and you can do with them, as you will. There is a problem however."

Clark snorted, waiting for the ax, the big thing. The "No Guys In Here " speech. Skinny little pale ass homophobe.'

"I told your mother that there'd be a housekeeper in the apartment with you. Kind of a den mother" Lex grinned, " But that's not going to be possible, so, you're on your own. It's up to you to be responsible. I'm sure you'll do just fine on your own And, I'll be checking on you from time to time. "

"Oh really? Well, I don't want to be a bother! And I really don't need a babysitter!" He knew he was lashing out at Lex, but frankly it felt good to let out some of the anger he'd harbored for so long at him. He turned to enjoy his mini- triumph, but when Clark looked at Lex, he was surprised by the expression on his face. He looked kind of tired and sad, and Clark thought that maybe he could...should, lighten up a bit. After all, the man probably barely remembered his complete and utter humiliation at his hands... Well, ok, probably not the right direction to go at this point..." Look, Lex, I'm really grateful for what you're doing for us. Really. Sit, and have some.." He looked in the fridge." Hmm, water or OJ?" He looked back At Lex and gave him the big smile.

" Oh... water.." Lex blurted out the first thing in his mind, most of which was occupied in committing that smile to memory. God, the kid was so beautiful. What kind of screwy evil fate would make him want Clark long after the boy could care less about him? It was fucked up beyond compare ...in that moment Lex decided that he was going to make Clark his. No matter what it took. Luthors always win. Except when they didn't. But this was going to happen. He would make it happen.

Clark sat a bottle of water and a glass down next to Lex .He debated pouring it for him, but figured Lex didn't deserve that from him. And no, he wasn't being petty. Clark's eyes narrowed as he looked at him. There was definitely something going on here, some strange undercurrent. Could Lex be afraid to be alone with him? Maybe he should assure him that wild horses couldn't get him to touch his scrawny little ass, ever again in this lifetime, cute as it was...'Shit! Oops! Darn...' Clark sat across the table from Lex and sipped at his orange juice. Lex sipped at his water. The silence began to stretch out more than was comfortable, and finally Lex broke.

" So, your mother mentioned a boyfriend?" Lex knew immediately that was not the thing to have said. Clark shot to his feet and turned to the sink, narrowly avoided crimping the stainless steel when he held on to it, "What, you mean my mother and you didn't discuss my whole life? She didn't tell you I'm "single" now? I'm shocked!" Clark threw himself back down on his chair. Lex stood and put his glass gently in the sink. He moved back to the front door and turned to face Clark.

"Clark. You've made it plain that you'd rather I wasn't here. I apologize. I really was trying to be helpful, and I'm sorry about your friend. I think I'll just let myself out. Please call me if you need ...anything" He gave Clark a little half smile and eased out the door. He was gone so quietly and quickly that Clark didn't have time to react. He sat staring at the door, his mouth slightly open, and his fingers made the edge of the table creak.

"*That, that JERK! He's doing it again! He's being all sexy! Slinking to the door, that stupid head tilt, stupid, stupid smile and.." Clark leaned his head on the table and sighed. He could feel tears pricking his eyes and his chest hurt ' It still hurts. Two years, and it still hurts too damn much.' Maybe, maybe it would be better to at least try to be his friend? Clark wasn't sure if he could do that but he was going to try. He'd managed it with Mark and with Whitney and God knows holding on to this grudge was more painful than letting it go, he figured. He needed to get himself together, be the person he was raised to be. Lex was back in his life for good or ill, and it was up to him to make the most of it.

"Hello, Lex? Jeez I hate talking on answering machines...anyway hi, I mean it's me...um... Clark. Yeah, uh, if you're not busy this Saturday, like that's possible I'm sure, heh, maybe you'd like to come over and watch a movie, if you're not busy....I'm kinda babbling hunh? Give me a call, bye!"

Lex was proud of the fact that he only played the message four or five times before erasing it. Luthors had self-control after all. He had no idea what brought about this incredible change in behavior on Clark's part but there was no way he was going to waste this opportunity. Oh, you bet he'd be there tomorrow. He shifted about the bed, pulling the sheets up, pushing them down. He punched his pillow viciously and bunched it up under his head. He couldn't get comfortable. Thoughts of being with Clark were making him nervous and he resented feeling like a kid before a first date. He tried to relax, tried to remember how it had felt when Clark had kissed him, but all that came to mind was the look on the boy's face, stunned and wide open and filled with pain, all because he couldn't tell the truth to Clark or himself then. He'd been attracted to him from the first, he'd flirted shamelessly with him and then tried to convince himself it meant nothing because he flirted with everyone. But he didn't have dreams about anyone like he had about Clark, dreams that woke him out of sleep, with hot tears running down his face and his head pounding from crying so hard while he slept. Even worse were the dreams in which he'd kissed Clark back instead of running, the one's that were so full of joy, contenment, that he felt physically ill when he woke, the sense of loss so strong that all he could do was lay there, just lay there and try not to hate himself. Somehow, he'd been given another chance, a chance to make things right, to make Clark his, and he was going to make the most of it.

Clark lay back on the bed, twisting and turning for what felt like hours now, sleep seeming to be just at the corner of his mind, but every time he actually began to drift off Lex's face would snap him back to wakefulness. 'Oh my God, what the heck was I thinking? What if I do something stupid, or say something dumb? What do we talk about? Hey Lex, how's that homophobia coming? Jeez, I need to stop that too!' He stared up at the ceiling, idly switching back and forth between watching the skeletons on the floor above watch TV, to staring at the crevices in the textured ceiling. His thoughts wandered back to Lex, wondering what he was doing now, on the phone on business maybe? He figured CEO types did that all the time, call all over the world on important matters, anyway they did it in the movies. He imagined Lex on the phone, looking serious and kind of sexy, the room lit just by his desk lamp, and no sound, because everyone else has gone home. He'd have his jacket and tie off, and his sleeves rolled up, because it's night now, he's a little tired, so tired that he doesn't hear the door open and close softly, doesn't know until he's right behind him that he's no longer alone. Clark imagined himself running his hands up Lex's sides and Lex pressing back into the caress, a little hum of pleasure vibrating in his chest. "*Clark..." He pictures himself pulling the shirt out of his pants and running his fingers under the waistband, stroking the smooth warm flesh there, pushing down a little farther as Lex arches back against him. Lex reaches behind him pulls his hips hard against him and rubs, rotating his hips and Clark is getting hard, groaning against Lex's neck... his hand is on Lex's dick, hot, and hard and velvety on his palm. His breath begins to catch, and he strokes a little firmer .Lex jerks and moans, begging Clark for more.. Clark is flying on the fantasy, he strokes himself harder, pants louder as he moves closer to climax, and then it hits him, his back arches till only his head and toes touch the bed and then he's above the bed, floating and rocking slightly in the air in the aftermath of coming*.

It was a good feeling, not to be in control for a few minutes. Clark sighed as he grounded himself. He remembered that he could never really relax that way with Mark. Any evidence of him being alien freaked him out too much. Sometimes Clark thought Mark's ability to keep his secret wasn't so much devotion as total repression. Mark was a good guy, though. Just not everyone could handle this stuff. Pete had had a hard time with it too, and he was a really strong person. Could Lex deal with it? He was probably pretty tough...not that it even bore thinking about. Clark turned on his side and pulled the pillow over his head. God, I just need a little sleep! Please don't let Lex keep hounding me...

Lex knocked on the apartment door at seven o'clock. Prior to that he had paced about in his own apartment, dressed and re-dressed, looking for just the right outfit, one that said casual, but not un-caring, and possibly let's have sex. Or not. He'd changed again and debated bringing a bottle of wine, what did one bring to watch movies? Beer? Soft drinks? Should he call and ask? Finally he'd just left his apartment and now he was standing at Clark's threshold, waiting.

Clark answered the door with a smile firmly pasted on. His entire body radiated the effort he was going through to be pleasant, Lex thought. 'God, this is going to be ...interesting..'He followed Clark into the living room and sat on the sofa. Clark looked at him expectantly, which confused him till he realized he was supposed to comment on the food.

"Nicely done Clark. It looks very appetizing." He gave him a little smile and warmed inside when Clark gave him a big smile back, cheeks flushing with pleasure. Lex was shocked at how much he'd needed to have Clark smile, really smile at him. He'd missed those blushes, so sweet and at the same time, so sexy.

They spent a little time good-naturedly arguing about which film to watch, and compromised on Star Wars. Both of them recited large parts of dialogue with the film, which naturally led to replacing it with their own.

"Wow, Lex, I can't believe how much Coke a person can hork out their nose! That was truly impressive!" Lex went from feeling like the biggest uncouth idiot to feeling like he'd done something brilliant just because Clark sounded really admiring and for the first time, his voice contained a real warmth. Clark was still chuckling as he passed Lex a handful of napkins so he could mop up.

" Well, Clark, it had been one of my life's goals, and thanks to you I've realized that tonight." Clark looked at him warily for a moment, but when he saw that Lex was grinning, he laughed and punched himgently on the arm. "Dork!" He said it so fondly that Lex could feel himself go pink with pleasure. 'Oh my Lord. I'm regressing completely here!' he thought to himself. But he couldn't remember the last time he'd felt so good, so relaxed and just...happy. When he passed the wad of napkins back to Clark, he made sure that their fingers made contact. I know what I want, I'm going for this! He was just about to touch Clark's wrist when the phone rang. 'Don't answer, don't answer' Lex practically yelled in his mind, but Clark the Dutiful went for the phone. "It might be my folks," He smiled and Lex returned the smile God, what timing..

He watched Clark's face as he answered the phone and felt a chill wash over him. Clark was startled by the voice on the other end. It wasn't who he expected at all."Whitney!" Lex's mind went into overdrive, Whitney? Girl, boy? Boy. High school friend, football, honor society ...very good-looking .Too good looking..and Clark's blushing. And smiling. Shit! I hate my life!

Whitney! Hearing his voice was so strange. The last time he'd talked to him was before he left for the service, and actually, they'd gotten pretty well pissed. Clark wasn't totally sure what happened that night; he wasn't sure how he felt to be hearing from Whitney now. Clark almost missed what he was saying to him in the flood of memories Whitney's voice unleashed.

"...Get together while I'm home? I'd really like to see you." Clark coughed and looked over at Lex who looked a little bored and stiffly polite. It seemed that the lovable dork of a moment ago had been replaced by Mr. Luthor. As Clark tried to figure out what happened, Lex looked at his watch and glanced at the door and that was all it took to send the Kent temper flaring. Staring pointedly at Lex, he answered Whitney," Hey, I'd love to go to dinner with you...or you could come here for dinner." He looked at Lex with eyebrows raised in question and he nodded slightly and shrugged. 'Total disinterest! What a fucking asshole. And yes I mean just that!' He turned his back to Lex and concluded his conversation. He became aware of a strange noise just at the edge of his enhanced hearing, a grinding noise, but when he turned again to look at Lex, it stopped. Just before he hung up Whitney said something that made him laugh, and he glanced at Lex see some people like me but Lex was gesturing that he had to go, he got his coat and waved goodbye and was gone before Clark could even draw a breath. Clark growled. "Whitney? Are you still there? Good. Hey, you know what, can you come now? Great, ok, fifteen minutes is fine for me."

Lex was still grinding his teeth on the elevator ride down. The effort that it had taken not to jump up and pound that phone to bits had really cost him. He was furious, hurt and feeling stupider than ever. He'd felt like Clark and he were getting somewhere, or was he lying to himself, seeing things that weren't there? Or was his karma that sucky that the universe was personally kicking every square inch of his ass? People on the street gave him a wide berth, here was a man, their expressions seemed to say, who was about to explode. Or worse, grab them by the collar and unload whatever terrible tale created that mood. Lex practically threw himself in front of a cab, yanking open the door before it quite came to a full stop and barking out directions to home. He stuffed himself into the back seat, slouching down and scowling ferociously. He was going to war. He was not losing, and that fucking kid was not going to drive him insane. Pushing down the tiny bloom of guilt for combining his Clark with an obscenity, he lay back and began to spin complicated and devious plans to win the day, and the boy.

Whitney was as good as his word and was at Clark's door in fifteen minutes. Clark had to admit, the service was good to him. He looked better than ever, his smile made Clark's stomach tingle. And yeah, that military cut looked good on him. He blushed to find himself wondering how it would feel under his hands, against his cheek. For a moment Clark was appalled at his unfaithfulness, and then mentally slapped himself extra hard,' Lex is not your ...anything! How can you be unfaithful to someone that barely acknowledges your existence?'

Whitney looked at Clark, and smiled a little "Clark, is it ok if I come in?"

"Oh, gosh, come in! I'm sorry," Clark backed up to give Whitney room to come in. They made their way back to the living room, and Whitney whistled when he saw the entertainment setup. "Wow, Kent! You must be doing pretty good for yourself! " He gave Clark a big grin and took in the rest of the living space." Really good. This is quite some place!" Clark blushed red and stammered a bit as he admitted to Whitney that the apartment wasn't his and then hastily explained the situation when Whitney got the 'Oh. That's how you have this great place' look. Whitney looked so relieved that Clark couldn't help but laugh, which set Whitney off and the two of them got caught up in a mutual laughing fit. Laughter was good, sharing without the talking and possible discomfort, a way of connecting again. They ended up on the floor, tangled up and giggling like little kids. Whitney found himself nearly on top of Clark, his faces inches from his, so close he could feel his breath on his lips, so close it was painful to look into Clark's eyes, so close he couldn't keep his own eyes open, or stop his lips from parting. Clark looked up into Whitney's face and felt drawn to him, the look on his face magnetic, angelic, he had to cover Whitney's lips with his, stroke them with his tongue. Stroke inside and feel the heat in his mouth, wetter as Whitney pressed back, opening wider and sucking Clark's lip in, nipping and licking and pulling Clark in deeper and harder. They broke apart, both of them breathing hard and grinning like loons at each other.

" Man!" Clark laughed a little shakily. " Um, I really didn't expect that..."

" What, being molested in your living room? Or that I'm a ok kisser?" Whitney grinned back.

Clark scrubbed his hands over Whitney's hair, and nearly purred in pleasure. " Oh, you're a lot better than ok, believe me! And after dinner, you get to show me what else you can do! " " Wow, Kent! Kinda bold! What happened to that shy kid I used to know?"

"He grew up, " Clark snapped out. Whitney wanted to smack himself. ok, not going to go there right now. I'm not going to kill the mood, Lord, don't let the mood be dead! He opened his mouth to apologize but Clark waved him off. "Don't pay attention to me, it's been an...interesting year for me. Let's eat?"

The little rough patch was forgotten as they ate and drank and talked about old times and a certain billionaire playboy and in general acted like kids without a care in the world. Regression was total as Whitney demonstrated how far he could spray a jet of ice-tea, unfortunately while facing Clark, who couldn't let the affront go unchallenged and eventually more food and drink were on the outside than the inside.

Clark channeled his mom as he struggled to get the living room back into pre-food fight shape 'Lex will have cow if he sees this mess' and the two of them ended up sitting on the floor, legs stretched wide in front of them and backs against the sofa. " Don't you think we look like some gay porn video?" Whitney asked as he wiped his hand down his bare chest.

" Maybe if I didn't have to wash all that stuff, I'd feel a little porny-er," Clark grumped. Whitney rolled the t-shirt Clark lent him into a ball and tossed it at him He got a challenging look in his eyes and said " Kent, it's my duty to make you feel porny. I feel that if we're sitting here half naked, it's just wrong not to take advantage." He nodded in a serious way that had Clark trying not to laugh." Yes," he continued "You must fall victim to my seductive wiles. Wides? Wills?" He let out a breathless laugh when Clark threw himself on top of him.

" Less talk, more sex," he growled. He nuzzled into Whitney's neck, nibbling and sucking until Whitney stopped chuckling and began to breathe a little rougher. They rolled together, away from the sofa and ending with Whitney resting full length on top of Clark. He could feel that Clark was as hard as he was, the heat from him made Whitney feel like he was burning, and every shift in position made him groan. Clark wrapped his arms around him, pressing his big hands into the small of Whitney's back, pressing their dicks together and began moving purposefully, sending shock after shock shooting into his groin, and pushing helpless gasps out of him. Clark rolled them both so that he was on top and licked his way down Whitney's neck and across his collarbones, nipping there a bit when Whitney groaned at the touch. Clark kept moving down, sucking a red trail down to his belly. Whitney jerked and grunted and panted as Clark worked over him, till he couldn't stand it, " Clark! Clark! Stop! " He pushed him back and Clark began to apologize, but Whitney just shook his head and began pulling at the waistband of his jeans. "Off, off!" God! I can't even put a sentence together...Oh! Before he could really gather his thoughts Clark was kneeling before him and pulling his jeans and boxers down and off and then stripping himself and he was hard and wow, big, ...nice...He reached out to Clark and stroked his shaking hand along his dick. Clark's eyes closed and he pushed into Whitney's hand with a small sigh, pumping once, twice." Oh, it's ...that's nice'" he breathed out when Whitney kissed the tip and rolled his tongue around the head. Whitney coaxed Clark into his mouth, wrapped his hands around his hips and sucked harder when he groaned. Clark pressed his hands against Whitney's cheeks, savored the feeling of his muscles working around him. " Ah, stop, stop now..." He pulled out as Whitney gazed at him, his eyes a little glazed. " What, did I not..." Clark folded over him. " You were perfect, wonderful, but I want to do this." His hand wrapped around Whitney and he bent down to kiss the head of his dick. Whitney jerked. and Clark took him in all the way, and Whitney's hips lifted from the floor Oh. My God! Clark's sucking me! Holy shit! Whitney panted, then moaned, he groaned louder and louder until he was yelling and telling Clark in great detail that he was a prince, a god, a fucking amazing cocksucker and then came in a shaking wailing rush. When he floated up out of the daze, he was aware of a seriously goofy grin on his face, Clark's very warm head on his thigh and an insistent banging. What the hell...the door? " Hey, Kent. Some ones at your door, man."

He jiggled his leg a bit until Clark rolled an eye up at him. " I know that, Whitney, it's a crazy person, pay no attention."

By now Whitney had figured out who the crazy person was, said crazy person shouting out their name while pounding on the door. He slithered out from under Clark, and hurriedly dressed. Clark sighed and did the same.

"Look Clark, you need to deal with this head on. Be a man; step up to the plate, blah blah...You know what I mean. Work it out or not, but deal with it," He leaned into Clark and kissed him lightly on the lips. " And if it doesn't work out, maybe you could call me..." He squared his shoulders and prepared to walk through the door when it flew open and a red-faced Lex scrambled in, keys in his hand. He glared at Clark as Whitney waved at him and made good his escape. Clark glared right back, and stared pointedly at the keys in Lex's hand. He shook them at Clark and snapped out " I lied! I do that sometimes!"

" You made my guest leave!"

" Is that what they're calling them these days!"

" What are you trying to imply, oh, you know what? Shut up!"

" You shut up! " Clark looked at him and stalked foreword and for a moment, Lex felt a shiver of fear, but Clark passed him and shut the door.

" Lex, what the fuck is your problem?"

Lex shot upright in the cab. The HELL with plans and thinking! Too much damn thinking, action now! "Turn around! Go back to where you picked me up! Now!"

The cabbie responded immediately, his heart's desire at t hat moment was to be rid of the whack job in the back who'd been talking to himself non-stop since he picked him up.. When he screamed up to the corner he'd picked up the nutcase from, the nutcase in question leaped out the cab in a shower of bills " Wow! Do you want me to wait?"

"Fuck you!" was his only response.
The cabbie peeled out again with a big grin.' Oh, yeah, look out for bald guys foaming at the mouth from now on!'

Lex pounded his way up the stairs, too furious to wait for the elevator. He was going to kick that guy out of there and make Clark confess that he still wanted him, Lex, and no one else and then they were going to do ...stuff. He stalked up to the door and knocked firmly. He leaned closer. Wait. There was definitely... stuff going on behind this door. He listened to someone yell, and realized it was that Whitney guy telling Clark he was wonderful, a prince, a god, a...What!!

He started pounding on the door, all self control blown to atoms. " Clark! No one treats a Luthor like this! Let me in now! It's Lex, dammit!" He stopped yelling long enough to direct a snarl at neighbors boorish enough to peek out their doors at the racket and was gratified to see them snap back as if he'd leveled a gun instead of a glare. Shit! The noises reached a crescendo, and there was silence...Lex ripped a set of keys from his coat pocket and jammed them into the lock, wrenched the door handle and almost fell into the room. Clark looked mad...' Well, buster so am I!'

Lex turned to Clark, drawing a deep breath because he had something to say, damnit, and he was going to make Clark listen to him. " Clark, enough..."

" Darn right!" Clark grabbed him and pushed him against the door and kissed him. Lex felt like his brain exploded, he felt his eyes roll up and his knees turn to water. Clark was holding him up by his lips and a thigh pushed between his legs. God! Please don't let me die now! I think my heart's going to blow out my chest.... When Clark pulled back, Lex dragged in a long gasping breath, and shook all over. Clark grinned at him, his face flushed red and his eyes sparkled. Lex didn't think he'd ever seen anything so beautiful. He opened his mouth to speak but Clark laid a finger on his lips.

" Uh-uh. It's better if we don't talk...just yet." Lex nodded his head in agreement and Clark. Picked him up. And carried him like a baby to the sofa with no effort at all. " What," Lex began, but Clark shushed him." Later, we have a lot to talk about. We'll talk about everything." Lex's curiosity immediately began warring with desire, but when Clark licked the curve of his ear, and breathed out, " Don't you want to do this first?" curiosity vanished in a full body shiver and an erection. Clark rubbed the heel of his hand across it and murmured " Ooh, good answer." Lex could only hear the embarrassing noises issuing from him. They cut off as Clark dropped to his knees and pushed in between his thighs. He stared down, pink, and panting and nervous. "Clark, I'm not sure what to do now.."

Clark looked at him in surprise. " You never..?"

" Of course I have! Just. You know. Not with a guy.."

Clark gazed up at Lex, and every moment he ever had that he thought of Lex, every bit of the love he felt, every good time they'd ever had together filled him, lit him from inside, and he straightened, took Lex's face in his hands and said, " I will never hurt you. I love you, I always have."

Lex's eyes filled with tears, and he shut them quickly, and whispered, "ok", in a shaky voice. He nodded as Clark reached out and unbuttoned his shirt, and kept nodding when he unbuttoned his trousers, couldn't stop nodding when he pulled them down and stroked his hands over his thighs. When Clark took his shoes off, and removed the trousers completely, Lex felt the need to verbalize his agreement. "Yes." When Clark undressed. "Yes." When he pushed himself back between Lex's legs." Yes! Oh!" when Clark licked him into his mouth.

Oh God. I'm doing this, it's real, and he wants me! Can you die from being happy? He's so beautiful, I have to tell him, ah! He smells so good, tastes so good...Clark's thoughts raced and tumbled over each other. He felt like floating, felt so wonderful that he had to check to make sure he was grounded. He drew nearly all the way off Lex's dick, and practically purred when he saw the state he'd reduced him to. Lex's head was thrown back, he was moaning and gasping. Clark felt a little rush of power, and took him down to the base of his dick. Lex's head snapped forward, and he stared wide-eyed as he watched Clark bob up and down on him. Clark hummed in pleasure, tasting and rolling his tongue around it, hollowing his cheeks as he sucked in so he could feel every bit of the hard length in his mouth, swallowing around it. Lex slammed his head back against the sofa, Oh, God, Clark! He reached down with one hand and grabbed Clark's head. His hips lifted and he pushed in. Clark moaned and gripped himself, his own hips pumping in reflex to Lex. He pulled off and leaned back.

Lex whimpered" What?" his hands patted Clarks shoulders, his cheeks," Please."

Clark slid up next to him on the sofa. "Let me make love to you", he whispered in Lex's ear. "I want to be in you." Lex's heart leapt and thumped in his chest.'Oh my..I...I'm not sure...!' Clark folded him into his arms and hugged him tight. "Don't worry. If you don't want to do this, it really is ok. We aren't doing anything you don't want..."

"Make me want it", Lex interrupted .He slid his tongue against Clark's lips, pressing until it slipped into Clark's mouth, stopped with his lips pressed tight against Clark's, stroked in and out for a moment before he pulled back enough to speak, his lips moving slightly against Clark's. "Make me want it. Fuck me." He whispered hoarsely. Clark groaned and flexed at that.

" No," Clark gasped, " I don't want to fuck you. I want to make love to you. I want it to be perfect. I want it to be so good that you can't imagine anyone else doing this to you ever." Lex's head fell to Clark's shoulder and he let out a long tremulous sigh. "I want that, I want it too."

Clark laid him flat and stroked him from shoulder to waist, long flat smooth strokes, relaxing and soothing him. He pressed the palms of his hands over Lex's nipples and rubbed lightly, just enough friction for it to tease and make him arch up into the touch .One hand flowed over him down to his aching dick, and squeezed and rubbed and 'Oh! It's so ...it's not like anything I've ever, oh God does this make me a girl... Clark laughed and for a moment of shock Lex thought he'd read his mind " Shit, I said that out loud didn't I?"

Clark grinned, " Yes. And also? No. What it makes you is mine." He kissed Lex softly, slowly and at the same time moved his hands lower, lifted Lex a little and pressed a hand between his thighs, sliding up until he made contact with the tightly puckered ring of muscle there. He slipped his finger over and around the hole, increased the pressure slowly, slowly as he also increased the pressure of his lips against Lex's, his tongue slid in and out of Lex's mouth and he pressed the tip of his finger in on each slide of his tongue, slowly, letting Lex get used to the idea, to the feeling. He moved his finger deeper, bit by bit, fucking Lex's mouth with his tongue till Lex caught the rhythm and began to respond, moving his hips in time with Clark as he began to relax and let Clark push in deeper. When Clark pulled out and moved back from Lex he nearly screamed for him not to stop. He was shivering and panting and about to beg for more when Clark hugged him, " Shh! I'll be right back. "

Lex's eyes rolled wildly till he tracked Clark moving to the kitchen. He was back in a moment with a small bottle of olive oil and a big grin, the one that Lex always imagined was just for him. Lex just stared at him, and Clark started to blush. "Ahh...lube?"

"Are you asking me or telling me?" Lex gasped, amazed that he could actually form a coherent sentence.

Clark leaned back over him. "It'll make it better." He pooled a bit of oil in his palm and swiped his fingers through it, and pressed them against Lex. They slipped in easily and Lex groaned at the change in feel. Clark's head dipped and he made a small sound as heat flared in his gut, burning him, and making him moan. Lex's eyes rolled back and every muscle in his body quivered." Are you ready, now, are you ready?" Clark panted on each stroke.

"Ah, God yes! Now, now, now!"

Clark grinned and stroked the rest of the oil on himself. He gasped and his eyes closed briefly before he bent to press his dick against Lex and push in as carefully as he could. Lex felt like he was on fire, felt the whole world centered on this moment. Clark had him, owned him body and soul and God! It felt so good!

It hurt, but not hurt, it burned but in a way that took his breath away and made him tremble and shake and groan, arch up and push back against Clark, who was fucking him so carefully it must be hurting him. His head was thrown back; he had his lower lip clenched so tightly between his teeth that it looked painful. At Lex's gasp, he lowered his head and looked at him with a smile that burned like the sun. He rolled his head to the side and kissed the leg he held on his shoulder, and thrust foreword more. Lex yelled a little at the change in angle and the wave- flash of sensation that swept through him, and Clark grunted and slid in deeper, in and out, pumping into Lex. He couldn't stop moving, all that existed was this point, the world reduced to heat and sound, sweat and scent. Lex's dick jerked as Clark took it in his hand and rubbed the tip, smearing the glistening strands of pre-come around it, stroking down and up, doing it until Lex arched up, threw his arms out and grabbed fistfuls of sheet and shouted, " Love you, love you, love you" as he exploded, his come spurting out, running hot over Clark's fist. Clark stiffened, hissed and moaned deep in his throat as Lex's orgasm pulled him right after, liquid fire ran down his spine and out of his dick, Lex could feel the heat and the pulse of it, and it shook him again, his breath stuttering as he was racked with after shocks.Oh shit, oh shit, I love him, I love this, wow, I really love him Clark pulled out carefully and spread himself over Lex. "Are you ok?"

" Oh yeah."

" Did you... like it?"

" Oh hell yeah!" Lex pulled Clark's face down to his and kissed him as though he'd never get another chance." I do, you know. Love you. Since I first laid eyes on you, I've been yours. I was just too stupid to know."

" You could never be stupid, baby. Umm, just a little dense!"

" Luthor's are incapable of being dense, my farm-raised friend, !"

" Aah ha... Look, remember when I said we need to talk. It's really important. I need to talk to you now. Before anything else gets said." Clark looked so serious that Lex's stomach sank. What could it be that made Clark look almost afraid? It didn't matter. He had him now. There was nothing he could say to change that. All he had to do was look in his eyes and know that Clark loved him as much as he loved Clark and nothing on this planet could ever change that.

*Dear Mom,
How are you? I'm doing fine, and so is Lex. He says to tell you hi. I'm so glad you and Dad made it out here for graduation; it was just great to see you guys! I'm going to be home real soon. I have to talk to you about something very important.

I think I have a responsibility to use my talents to help those in need, and I think I know how. Lex and I have talked about it and he thinks we might have a workable idea. We're not in total agreement, so I need you and Dad's input. It's time I think for me to take my place in the world. How I do that, I'm hoping you guys and Lex can help me figure out. And if I haven't said it before, thanks, Mom, for everything. You know what I mean.

Love, your son Clark*, (and Lex!)

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